Why is Kadon so wordy!?

Hey All,

The quotes are going a little slow this week.  Mostly cuz I discovered the obscure mixture of work and kickboxing that causes insane lethargy.

In other news, everyone should watch/support the amazing awesome sauce that is Gamers 3: Hands of Fate.  It's produced by a local Seattle group, Zombie Orpheus Entertainment, who also happened to throw a con... why?  Cuz why the hell not!

These guys have made:
Gamers
Gamers II: The Dorkness Rising
Journey Quest 

And other shows easily watched on the youtubes.

-Ioni

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"Why is your room mate busy?" GM
"Because he is getting naked and doing his naked dance." Ioni
"Okay, I did not need to have that information." GM

"We were at a con.  You have to do the ritualistic con-detox afterwards." Ioni

"I hung out with the Gamers people.  Got drunk with the Gamers people...  Saw titties with the Gamers people..." Zuko

"And ioni pulls out her dice and I was like, oh this will not end well." Zuko

"Scot C. Brown, the guy who plays Leo is the only one of the group of them to actually go through the full drinking game rules as written.  I asked the guy who plays Gary, and he's like 'Oh gods no!! Scott's the only one who got to do that because he's a raging alcoholic.'  When I told Scott that I only got through the first 20 minutes, he put his hand on my shoulder and said 'then you must train harder.'"  Zuko

"You're incomprehensible." Kadon
"Your mom's incomprehensible." Zuko

"All I had was one glass of something, a shot of something and a sip of something else." GM on 'Going out Drinking'
"You and I have very different definitions of drinking.  And mine is kind of light." Ioni

"I heard tequila, something and 151..." GM
"Alright, that's it!  Fuck Skype!" Zuko

"Last time Zuko made Mercury cry." GM
"And he felt good about it." Ioni
"To be fair, she is a girl." Kadon

"Ioni, cuz she is a hotline straight to the Unconquered Sun.  Mnemia cuz her past incarnation used your own children as manse parts..." GM
"I think at one point Mnemia thinks that's all kids are good for as well." Mnemia
"Considering you have the little creepy children who we really should just kill for manse parts." Ioni

"The difference being Raxin  Hsen didn't have to carry his spare parts for a year." Mnemia

"As for Kadon.. well.." GM
"It's not [Kadon IRL] so much as Kaodn... Errr... Karum.. GOD DAMMIT you're both the same in my head!" Ioni

"Assuming she never gets mad at anyone, and never does something she would regret.  You're right, we are perfectly safe so long as the Incarnae act in a completely rational and proper behavior." Zuko
"To be fair, they pretty much largely have." Kadon
"Until they get addicted to the Game!" Zuko

"And then completely bypassing that question and asking what happened to our friend that's not really there anymore but went off on someplace else." Ioni
"Ok.  Time out... just really quick.  So I take it, I had the conversation with Kadon and Mnemia about this.  While we were gone, did Ioni just get really fucking high or take a lot of blows to the head?" Zuko
"It is Nexus.  I think the last time you left her alone in Nexus she got high and drugged on Bright morning."  GM
"I did?" Ioni
"Yeah, you were seeing things for a while." GM
"Those were perfectly legitimate things!" Ioni

"What ever happened to Aboshi?" Ioni
"Seriously?" Zuko
"Cuz someone told me she is being detained in Malfeas against her will." Ioni
"Who.!" Zuko
"A mutual friend?" Ioni
"Whoooo.!" Zuko
"A powerful mutual friend?" Ioni
"Whoooo...?" Zuko
"Oh he just works at an Embassy, don't worry about it." Ioni
"I see."  Kadon catches on.
"How did you get this information?" Zuko
"It's amazing what happens when you talk to people and go out for a cup of tea!" Ioni
"Right." Zuko
"I stepped away to reheat burritos.  What did she say?" Mnemia cuts in sharply
"I don't know why that was funny, but a mental image of Mnemia rolling back in the room with a fuckin' burrito." Kadon

"No no no no!  See, you set up some whores and that's good.  I don't think you've gotten any into Malfeas yet." Zuko
"No, I didn't." Ioni.
"So where does this info come from?" Zuko

"I'm pretty sure we do, cuz Ioni's not smart enough to know who Virumipra is." Zuko

"One issue on that..." Ioni
"Oh?" Kadon
"She may be with a little royalty. And her party may have wigged out." Ioni

"They may be in a bit of hot water due to companions not behaving like companions anymore." Ioni
"Three more euphemisms and I am punching something.  Just Sayin'!  Mnemia, get the sword out!" Zuko

"Shouldn't be more than a few minutes." Kadon
"What.!?" Zuko
"Recovering them." Kadon
"How...." Zuko
"Magic!" Kadon

"Well the problem with that is if her party member Judy Dench is acting up, maybe she doesn't want that person to come back with her, but that person still needs to be pulled out due to well, royalty having their way with them." Ioni
"Yes...." Kadon
"WHAT?!"  Zuko

"And the queen bitch!" Zuko
"No, wrong royalty." Ioni
"Then which fucking royalty are we talking about!?" Zuko
"Uh slightly lower tier, the spawn of Queen?" Ioni
"Oh lovely." Kadon
"The worst fucking idea ever!" Zuko
"We are talking about Green Princes, right?" Ioni

"GM!  You're fuckin' fired for sending the information through this!  Like, fuck you sir!" Zuko on Ioni
"Yeah, uh, Ioni doesn't get to talk to people alone anymore." Kadon

"Look, I don't want to be the dick here, but you're getting the information from there.  Kind of confused how.  You can't summon anything!" Zuko
"I didn't summon anything?  I just had tea!  Again! you miss the purpose of tea!" Ioni

"It's time for a little Malfeus Interuptus." Kadon
"Yeah, let's fuckin' do it.... Oh Jesus." Zuko

"So what do you do." GM
"Obviously keep away from Zuko so he doesn't hit me." Ioni
"Don't think distance matters." GM
"Well it makes Ioni feel better!" Ioni
"Are you within a mile..." Zuko

"You can't tell if I'm speaking Rat or Squirrel.  The languages are similar!" Zuko

"So J'paffing every single one of you people." Zuko

"Out of curiosity... what do you tell them?" GM
"Sup..." Zuko

"Personally, I'm down with the cover story : Kadon's about to do something incredibly stupid.  So really no matter what happens that should cover us." Zuko
"By us, you mean you, Mnemia and maybe Ioni." GM

"Your room mate really fucked you up and not in a good way." Ioni
"Little barf machines decided 'hey, his stuff doesn't belong ot her, that's perfectly ok to throw up on!!'" GM
"So pets will punish you if you are a dick to them." Mnemia
"I was never a dick.... I only threw something at one of them once.  I was like fuck it!  You can't do anything worse to me than you already are.." GM
"Your just inability to learn is just... mind boggling sir... Believe me, there is just noe end to what cats can do that will ruin your life." Zuko

"So if anything goes wrong, we can blame it on a training exercise." Zuko

"Kadon is a training exercise." Zuko
"Especially for my new employees." Ioni
"Apparently I have been having fun and missing it again!" Kadon
"They haven't been using ribbons to keep track either." Ioni

"Y'know, College Co-eds can be forgetful" Ioni
"Too busy putting themselves through college." Kadon
"So don't be surprised if you start seeing yourself in the next generation." Ioni
"NO!" Zuko

"Last thing we need is a bunch of Kadon half cast running around." Zuko

"Look, one way or another, I am going to see myself in the next generation.  It's just going to take some time." Kadon
"And it may also be your daughter." Ioni
"No.  The great thing about a photographic memory is its easy to keep track of!" Kadon
"What if you never see her." Ioni
"Then... fuck!  I need to invent a charm I think." Kadon
"Unfortunately essence sight doesn't do that for ya!  It's not Maury Pauvich sight!" Zuko

"Infallible not fuck my daughters." Kadon
"Incest mendicant spirit."  Zuko

"So Zuko and Kadon come up with goofy names for charms that could avoid incest....  GM goes 'better ways around it!' "Zuko
"It's my job!" GM
"How can I allow for daddy banging!" Zuko

Panty blossom the room!!!

"I thought about the game all week!" GM
"Yes, you spent the whole week thinking of how to kill us with your penis." Ioni
"Such a perfect response to that." Mnemia
"Ioni, sweetie...  you don't need to take out penis hatred on the rest of us." Zuko

After Ioni links the previous weeks quote of the GM killing the group with a phallus.
"Oh, okay.  I just always assumed GMs penis was phallic shaped." Zuko
"Y'know there is another quote that says you're pretty aware of what GMs penis looks like." Mnemia
"Hence my point - look, you guys expect me to remember shit from a week ago.  That's just not fair." Zuko

"My bad, I thought Ioni said she was going to cut back on fantasizing about Kadon" Zuko
"Uh, that's gonna be hard to do." Ioni
Long silence
"Okay, I got my pants off now." Kadon
"Information the rest of us did not need." GM
"And yet you wanted it." Zuko

"My boobs are offended." Ioni
"Why?" Zuko
"By what?" Kadon
"I don't know."  Ioni
"oh nah, I'm just going to walk away form this.  this is going no where good... unless it is." Kadon

"Boobs don't expire Ioni.  Actually that's wrong." Kadon
"I thought I had shared pictures of where they had" Ioni
"I realized and I recant my previous statement.  All the more reason to share them now." Kadon
"Yeah, no!  Not gonna happen!" Ioni

On Cloud Atlas
"Is this gonna be a movie with a lot of stupid people going 'I just couldn't follow it!'" Zuko
"Yes" Kadon
"Sonovabitch." Zuko

"Looks like we can start turning out the industrial powered dildo." Zuko
"Dude, I thought we weren't going to talk about that." Ioni
"I've got a system to try and run it on solar power, but it's not working directly.  Also, Seattle solar power sucks!" Zuko
"I'd say you're better off trying to capture the rain for power." GM
"Shut up Captain L.A." Zuko
"Dude, I will fucking trade you!" GM

"Is GM suggesting that we use the torture device machine from the Princess Bride to power a sex thing.. toy... machine...  English words go here!" Ioni
Zuko interprets - "Ioni wants to know if you wanted to use The Machine from Princess Bride as a sex toy."
"More like the machine from Eurotrip, it sounds like." Kadon
"I have not seen that movie." GM

"I'm playing the Bad Piggy's game.  It's the sequel to Angry Birds, and wow.... their animations are terrible, the should feel bad." Zuko
"Your animation is bad, you should feel bad?" Ioni

"If you look at that and think, 'Oh wait!  Here's this giant plot thread I have been running for two years that these guys know nothing about'... you should probably mention that." Mnemia
"Yes please!" Ioni
"You say that as if you don't trust me!" GM
"Pre.... cisely.  We still love you though!" Ioni
"Should we?" Zuko
"It's not about trust, it's about this game turning into Cloud Atlas times seven.  I appreciate your restraint of the time traveling device.  That really would have sucked balls." Mnemia

"We need our Wiki Page on perforce.  I'm checking this out.  No one can touch it!" Mnemia

"Perfects?  Back in my day we had to roll it!" GM
"Do you want me to call you an old geezer?" Ioni

"Okay, last game, you had just penny blossomed the room." GM
"Peony.   like the flower." Kadon
"Not penny" Ioni
"Whatever." GM
"Elbow." Zuko
"Dead." Mnemia
"So yeah, like I said you panty blossomed the room, every thing is dead." GM
"Panty blossomed the room?" Kadon
"Actually that might be a good name for a charm!" GM
"Possibly for my game instead." Kadon

"I kept thinking about your alchemical testing ground." GM still on Panty Blossom
"Mnemia, are your giant transformers fucking or rather docking in space?" Zuko
"The worlds first fan/fic between battleships." GM
"UNIVERSE!" Kadon
"Gonna fire my torpedos!" GM
"Actually innuendo is so hard to come by in that game." Mnemia
"Mnemia is so happy in that game." Zuko

"You're Mega Maid?" Zuko
"No, not that tall.  I'd need to be essence 7 to be Mega Maid." Mnemia

"There's a series of transformers where you're eventually watching Evangelion?  what?!"  GM

"Am I the one who is gonna have to go hug this guy?"  Ioni
"If you were capable of grappling him, maybe." Zuko
"I can't grapple, but I can hug!" Ioni
"All he needs is a hug!" GM
"You know what?  The world would be less psychotic if everyone gave each other a hug and then stole each others wallets."  Ioni
"I tried but you got mad at me for grabbing your ass." Kadon
"You then went for the boobs right after." Ioni
"They were at head level... what?" Kadon
"No." Ioni
"SIGH" GM
"GWLMGMGLLHWW" Kadon imitating motor boating.

"It's been 4 seconds!" Kadon
"Yeah, I learn a lot when punching things!" Zuko

"Ioni can get hit by non-essence damage." Ioni
"Fine, we'll make you artefacts this week if you want." Zuko
"I like being the non-threatening one." Zuko

"Ok, Kadon..." GM
"Yes?" Kadon
"Some jerkface just took away my turn so that leaves..." GM
"Oh, my turn?  I forgot we were in  battle!" Kadon

"Mnemia... can you give me a lift?" Ioni
"I guess" Mnemia
"Clench up Legolas." Zuko
"That's my line!" Kadon

"He's a hundred and four yards away.  You can just BOOM!" Zuko on sniping.
"How much damage can Gavin take?" Ioni
"Woah woah woah." GM
"MY JOB!  MY JOB!" And it's not hurting Gaving.  It's punching him in the face?" Zuko

"Who shoots Gavin with an arrow?  C'mon!" Zuko

"I'm apparently making [NPC] like [Zuko] a lot so he will stop fighting you and take it up the ass for you." Ioni
"Wow... Weaponized Date Rape drug." GM
"Kadon gave it to me." Ioni
"Don't make this my fault!" Kadon

"I wonder if I could use lambent bolt of annihilation with this, Kadon." Ioni
"I'm not sure your care bear stare needs to be AOE" Kadon
"The next thing the two armies realize they were fucking on the battlefield."  GM
"Don't ask, don't tell." Kadon

"And what am I resisting again?" GM
"PEACE AND LOVE!" Ioni
"Thats...  awesome" GM deadpan.

"One moment, I hear screaming.  I'm mildly concerned."  GM
"She discovered that she is in your basement." Ioni
"Yep, she found the way out of the basement." Zuko
"Yeah, if I had a basement that might mean something." GM
"Cuz clearly that's what's wrong with that line of thinking." Kadon

"...and hits everyone whom she wants dead.  Which is most of these invisible bitches.  All of these invisible bitches." Mnemia
"Mnemia, I'm sorry.  You lost all bad ass points when you got to 'which is most of these invisible bitches.'"  Zuko

"See if Ioni did her job and got the bad mojo out of this dice roller." Mnemia

"I'm just going to position it to you this way, Kadon.  Ioni can still go ahead and learn to summon demons.  Which of the two of you do you want controlling our demon horde?"  Zuko
"What I want as a player, does not alter what Kadon would do in this case." Kadon

"Technically, none of my bits have to touch him to attack him."  Zuko
"Less ripping." Kadon
"More gripping?" Ioni
"Okay, I light some candles, some Barry White music..." Zuko
"Some Kenny G." GM
"And say come to Zuko" Zuko

"He seems incredibly emancipated under there because of the shape of the body is something you expect to see in Abercrombie and Fitch." GM
"Emaciated, GM.  Emancipated means freed." Zuko

"Every time we take our eyes off of a kid, they do something stupid." Mnemia
"That's kind of why Zuko is at the point where we should murder all children." Zuko

"Zuko will say.. Dude.. he'll look at Gavin, look at the thing... look at Gavin, look at the thing... you gotta stop bein' such a bitch!" Zuko
"I beg your fuckin' problem!" GM
"I'm sorry, which one of us came down kicked his ass while you just flailed around then beat his ass?  Oh right, me.  We need to toughen you up.  That's why I punched you in the face.  Gotta make you a man!" Zuko

"Thats because he knows when someone with a bigger dick shows up" Zuko
"You know what works better than dodging us?  Talking to us." Mnemia
"Exactly." Kadon

"Guy goes to hell, punch him in the face." GM
"Guy whines about going to hell, punch him in the face" Mnemia
"Guy tries to sleep with Mnemia's kids, punch him in the face." Zuko
"Okay, no he didn't.  You need to stop." GM
"Future version of him and crazy fucked up shit to us via time whammy jammy and leaving little notes being smarter than you bull shit, punch him in the fucking face." Zuko
"I haven't done that!" GM

"I have long since stated that if I come across future selves that are trying to project us, first thing I am going to do is punch future me in the face." Zuko
"You know future you knows its coming so he's never gonna show up." Ioni
"Well he's gonna step behind future Kadon that's for damn sure." Zuko

"Are you telling the truth?" GM
"Yes" Zuko
"Gavin will nod and say okay." GM
"Have you seen future me?" Zuko
"I'm not punching him in the face!" GM
"Best way to avoid my question..." Zuko
"No.." GM
"I'm watching you!" Zuko

"Gavin, it's only mostly personal." Zuko

"You (Gavin) did try to mack on Mnemia's kids." Zuko
"I'm not sure that's true by the way, I'm pretty sure we did make that up because it was funny." Kadon
"No." Zuko
"I'm pretty sure Mnemia's kids were macking on him and he wasn't reciprocating." GM
"That's lesson number one, man." Mnemia

"Is this what pain is?" GM as Goth Ophelia
"Yes, suck it up." Ioni
"It's kind of awesome." GM
"Wait, back it up.. what?"  Ioni
"It's not like I'm going to start seeking it out!" GM
"Well if you do start seeking it out, make sure you go to someone you trust, like Mnemia or Zis."  Ioni
"Let's go through the number of people in this party should ever go to for Morals... How about NONE!" Zuko

"I'm sorry, after you've seen a man hump a lamp post, it's really hard not to be concerned." Zuko

"and... I've only slept with the fleshy ones that are human shaped and normal looking.  I have not had sex with a mail box, a lamp post, a warstrider sized woman....  Not even sure how that would happen without drowning." GM

"Hey dear, can you be under-aged twins for me tonight?" Mnemia
"There's nothing creepy about it, it's just y'know." Zuko
"No!  I am never going to have sex with Mnemia's kids." GM
"Fine, they are not good enough for you." Zuko

"Fuck you Captain Bullshit Charms!" Zuko
"YOU CAN GET THEM TOO!" Kadon