Sunday, September 09, 2012

Can I play a 750xp mortal?

And Next Week will be another brief break.

"Yep, kind of sent him your way since you may know of other games looking for players." Ioni
"That's okay, I'll wrangle him." Kadon
"Wrangle or strangle?" Ioni

"The Story Tellers Apprentice... What's that?" Zuko
"That's my stuff.  I wanted to have a place where I could play with stuff that wasn't Sins or Redness." GM
"C'mon somebody make the penis joke." Ioni
"Uhm, GM, you have a funny penis." Zuko
"That really wasn't what I was thinking, but okay." Ioni
"GM, Ioni thinks your penis is perfectly normal." Kadon
"What?!" Ioni

"Ioni's opinions about Kadon's penis were spoken to me in private and its going to stay that way." Zuko

"Well do you know what I think would make you feel better?" Zuko
"Booze." Ioni
"That and a Zuko Hug.  Just sayin'.  Everyone else in the party doesn't seem that unhappy and I think it's because you have lack of Zuko hugs.  Cuz I've hugged everyone in this game in the past year." Zuko

"If I have to go home, bad things happen to this game." GM

"It's cheaper there, it's nicer, but its full of Republicans." GM

"That's not Republicans, that's racists." Kadon

"GM can we get essence greater than 10?" Zuko
"NO." GM

"Modern progressive nations that fucking hate each other." Mnemia

"... so I stopped looking." Mnemia on artefacts
"Oh you exhausted your options." Zuko
"Well I went looking for the hair sticks, couldn't find it.  I went looking for the ring and couldn't find it.  So I decided you were all making shit up and stopped looking." Mnemia

"All 3 dot artefacts are not made alike." Kadon

"Hey GM, do we get training time?" Zuko
".. yeah" GM

"I almost took the counter attack one, that would have been hilarious."  Zuko
"Counter attacks are.. they can get interesting."  Kadon
"Well it's a counter attack that negates the attack too." Zuko

"So I did contemplate weather or not I could redirect the God Spear." Zuko
"I'm sorry, can you repeat that?" GM

"That e-mail I sent you is a summary of pain and suffering." Mnemia

"... And when I am rolling damage, 10s count as double." Mnemia
"What the fuck?!" Kadon

"You are never allowed to bitch about me, GM" Zuko

"But the horrible things we can find in the first printing of the first rule book, oh wow.  We could just end the world in the first couple of sessions." Mnemia

"Okay, the majority of the party are giant robots slash vehicles.  How do I make a story that works?  Apparently the answer is to watch a lot of transformers."  Kadon

"..I want a couple of celestials in there as a yard stick." Kadon

"750 XP?  Yeah, you could build Solars that could fucking tear those things apart." Zuko

"Kadon, you should sit around your place and watch lovely owl." Zuko
"It's on a constant loop in the back of my brain." Kadon

"... And then let's go find Octavian, who is for some reason the biggest pussy of 2nd circle demons." Zuko
"... It's not his fault he was in the first printing!" Kadon

"Where the hell do I find the trauma information!" Ioni
"Right next to the poison." GM

"He's here to steal your whores, Ioni." Zuko
"Hey, no stealin' my hoes." Ioni
"Here to steal your religion.  Actually I'm not stealing your religion, I'm ... well... no... I ...  you can have your faith and your religion is belong to me." Kadon

"Can I play a 750 XP mortal?" GM

"I can has healing now." Kadon

"So Mnemia is a sociopath." Kadon
"A high functioning sociopath!" Mnemia

"Some Yozi just want to watch the world burn." Zuko

"I would say your girlfriend has a higher compassion than you."  GM to Mnemia
"And she's a fuckin' Abyssal!" Zuko

"Temperance is still a 1 so she's still a whore." GM
"What's wrong with that?" Ioni
"Just like Ioni." Mnemia

"It counts as an acid bath!" Ioni

"If there is one thing Ajoran loves, it's compassion." Zuko

"Not that Zuko would ever punch a party member in the face" Zuko
"You've never ever done that before.." GM
"Hey, Gavin is not a party member, and don't you try to make him a party members." Zuko

"I'm actually kind of hurt." GM
"I'm surprised you're hurt.  Have you not been paying attention?  Like 4 years of Gavin Hating." Mnemia

"I am pretty sure Zuko was attached to Miss Fuzzums from the get go." Zuko

"It doesn't help that someone in the party is like... Did someone walk into the room wearing green?!" GM
"I'm not wearing green." Ioni
"Really?  Because green is the whores color."  Kadon
"I'm not being a whore for you today, Kadon." Ioni
"Awww..." Kadon
"Technically in this world, it's blue." GM
"Then we may have issues." Ioni

"What are we talking about?" Zuko
"Whores" Mnemia
"Wait GM, if your pee is blue..." Zuko
"No, why would you go there?!" GM
"I just naturally assumed you were telling everyone the recent color of your genitals or urine.  I wasn't sure which, I mean the less disturbing..." Zuko

"GM if the shape of it could be a topic of conversation you should probably see a doctor." Zuko
"Alright, I'm looking at 4 months." GM
"Of therapy?  Maybe." Ioni

"With enough Essence, you can force someone to believe anything." GM

"Wait, are you being Skeevy about it?" Ioni
"No" Kadon
"Yes" Mnemia
"Goddammit Mnemia!" Kadon

"He's gonna sonic rainboom your face!" Zuko

"They know and actually used a cockatrice i the show.  Wow!  They know D&D monsters!  ALRIGHT!" GM
"I think what you mean is they know mythological characters" Kadon
"Yeah, shuttup." GM

"One day, I would like to do something other than fucking work." GM
"You're putting money into your 401k, right?" Mnemia

"I designed it to be dick resistant." Kadon

"Trying to figure out how to apply Ioni to this particular problem." GM
"With plenty of lube." Kadon

"... GPS under the skin for tracking birds n' shit." Mnemia on her kids
"You're gonna Lo-Jack your kids." GM
"I love it!  Now if you don't behave, Mommy is going to have the primordial go in and fundamentally alter your soul and existence in order to make you dumb again!" Zuko
"Wow.... that being said, I have some cortex bombs in case you need it." Kadon

"What is this? Step-mom adopting?" Mnemia
"Yes" GM
"Oh I give up, she can do whatever!" Mnemia

"The job is taking care of a child... and not one of yours... and also not fucking up the child." GM
"Ohhh, that's probably not gonna happen." Mnemia
"Define 'taking care of.'?"  Zuko
"Yeah...." Mnemia
"Surrogate Mom!" GM

"This sounds wrong, but you shoved it in there, you get it out!" Ioni on a wine bottle cork (it was really jammed in there!!!)
"What's that?!" GM
"Ioni wants her booze!" Ioni
"Ioni can't remove a cork from a wine bottle." Zuko

"Say it with me Nel- Um- Bo" Kadon
"Nel noom bo" GM
"Nelumbo." Kadon
"Anyway, Elbow..." GM

"We'll talk about her taint and how bad her taint is." Mnemia

"Show me where to punch the tumor." Zuko

"There was an odd tone to that..." GM
"There wasn't an odd tone to that!  DAMMIT!" Kadon with that tone

"You know enough to put a hand right over Ioni's mouth when she starts talking. Oh! I know that look!  That's the look of stupid coming right at me!" Mnemia

"I love the idea that we have to keep our Social Bot on a gurney with the Hannibal Lecter shit on because she just randomly will do something retarded.  So we take off the mask 'oh my god, you're so hot and amazing I'll do whatever you want!' And then put the mask back on because she is gonna do something dumb."  Zuko

"Hey GM, I've actually botched less using Traipse than I have with normal dice.' Ioni
"You are the Botch Queen" Kadon
"No, that's my friend.  She's the Botch Queen.  I'm the Botch General." Ioni
"Princess?" Kadon

"I would prefer not to let people down into the core areas." GM
"It's okay, he's a doctor." Zuko

"And it's just that, an offer.  I believe I could be of assistance in this area." Zuko using Kadons phrasing for picking up people in the bar

"I start talking to Mnemia about disposing the Rats." Ioni
"Please excuse the dumbass trollop. She does not speak for the rest of us." Zuko
"Yet." Ioni

"Can you think of anything more terrifying than Ioni with infinite cosmic power." Kadon

"Pink is evil.  Pink is a satanic color." Ioni
"How do you figure?" GM
"Bitches be crazy." Ioni

"Goddammit y'all watch the show so we can talk about it without spoilers!" Kadon

"So what I'm now is Su mo mo mo" Mnemia
"There you go, now you are set!" Zuko

On a movie ... "It's got Nazi's and Arctic Bases and maybe even Zombies.  I don't want to spoil it for you.  It's fuckin' Wolfenstein as a movie, like you have to watch it!  But like the good Wolfenstein." Zuko

1 comment:

killervp said...

"That's the look of stupid coming right at me!" Awesome!