Sunday, April 13, 2014

The body parts of the USA

"So, if Arizona is the armpit of the US, does that make Texas the love handles?" The Apostle

"On certain things, I like to think of Texas as the sweaty ball sack of America." Ambassador

"Thank you for reminding me of that.  My attention was elsewhere." Invisible Crow
"You play with it, you don't stare at it all day." Apostle

"We're at a warehouse and children are running by.  It's like a slim-jim, just snap into it." Apostle

"so, eating small children or not?" GM
"Negatory." Ambassador
"Find a little Chinese one later?" GM
"But then you're hungry an hour later." Ambassador

Dirty Martial Artists

"I'm trying to enter but it won't let me."  Night River Hunter
"Gotta get it drunk first." Apostle
"That is far too accurate." Night River Hunter

"If his internet is out, how is he talking to us?" Invisible Crow
"Magic." Ambassador

"If you didn't make that choice, you're retarded." GM

"Night River Hunter lasted 30 minutes.  Invisible Crow lasted 12." GM
"I'm glad I lasted longer than Invisible Crow." Night River Hunter
"Who doesn't." Apostle

"A couple people ask you questions but as long as you don't get all Tom Cruise on them, you're okay." GM


Food orders are haaard

"Basically, if you're an engineer, you've got aspergers." Apostle

"Well, happy for a couple of minutes.  He'll find something to complain about sooner or later." GM
"Don't spoil it!" Night River Hunter
"Jews!" Apostle

"Night River Hunter are you at home now?" Apostle
"Yep, I'm at home." Night River Hunter
"I just wasn't sure where you were." Apostle
"Tracker isn't working right now." GM

"Aaand my mouse just died." Apostle
"No, quick give it CPR." Night River Hunter

"The chunky kind... yes.  Thank you." The Ambassador ordering food on the phone
"The Ambassador likes it chunky!" Apostle
"There was some confusion with my food order.  And I forgot to mute my mic.  Goddammit." The Ambassador

"Hold on, I'm hearing the whispers!" Apostle
"From now on, GM's cat is the Whispers!" Night River Hunter
"I believe they are hungry." Apostle

Wear a Tutu, Invisible Crow. WEAR IT!

"You wanna do it from your couch." NRH
"Yeah, the previous version of Traipse stopped working on all my machines last week." The Ambassador
"Yeah having something go weird on one machine is one thing.  Having it shit the bed across all the PCs you've got at the same time..." GM
"Is fucking bizarro." The Ambassador

"Alright, I caught up with most of the conversation through the chat. I am installing a new dice roller into my traipse." Invisible Crow
"You are installing a new Traipse." The Ambassador
"God dammit.  THANKS! The one time Traipse is working, I gotta re-install it." Invisible Crow
"This is a new version.  It's got shiney things in it.  It makes things shiney... and they look shiney.." Night River Hunter
"That's what you fuckin' said the last time." Invisible Crow

"I take it everything that I want is in drop box?" Invisible Crow
"Everything except the nudi-pictures." Night River Hunter

"Sweet, what did you do to make that happen?" The Ambassador
"Sacrifice a goat I think." GM
"I tried that with the other version." The Ambassador

"Wait, are we dropping Skype now too?" Invisible Crow
"Skype is bullshit. Skype can bite my ass.  Every time I try to do a windows update it tries to update my skype. It causes my computer to reboot on a daily basis.  I'm sick of this shit and I want to uninstall this fucker.  So yes.  I'm angry with Skype.  I don't want their goddamn ads, and I don't want them updating my system every time I log in." GM


"There is a program that keeps trying to access the outside world.  And there is a security thing that keeps informing me of this every single fucking day." Invisible Crow
"What program?" The Ambassador
"That's the catch.  The security thing is totally 'WE CAUGHT THIS THING!!!' Okay, what is it? 'We totally caught it..' What is it you fucking dicks?  It gives me no information."  Invisible Crow

"Everything goes white." GM when Invisible Crow is talking on Google Hangouts.
"Why is mine white?" Invisible Crow
"Because you want white power." Night River Hunter
"Fuck you, man." Invisible Crow
"Why are you such a racist..." The Ambassador
"We are bad people..." Night River Hunter

"I'm seeing the McConnelling 'I want it that way' when it should be playing the wiener song." GM

"And Invisible Crow is back.  And he's not racist." The Ambassador
"And now he's white again." GM
"Stop being racist!" The Ambassador

Weiner
McConneling

"It sounds like your cat got a legendary success in the background." Invisible Crow
"He thinks he gets food." GM

"I have better things to do with my willpower.  Like change the laws of an entire people." The Ambassador
"so, like Russia." Night River Hunter
"Referendums are a crutch." The Ambassador

"You see a balanced stance, despite the motion of the ocean." GM

"Uh GM, just a bit.  What would happen if I abandon my post and hide for a bit?" Invisible Crow
"WE CRASH" Night River Hunter whispering

"wits plust bureaucracy." GM
"Shit... I botch!" Night River Hunter
"I think in this case, the best thing I can do is to leave you to your own devices." GM

"The Ambassador is now bitching about Google Hangout." Night River Hunter
"No one is allowed to bitch about the Google. Shut your trap and love the Google." GM

"SWEET! we get to aid in a kicking to the nuts!" Night River Hunter
"You are way too excited there." Invisible Crow
"I like kicking people in the nuts." Night River Hunter

"He could have gotten lost in the Labyrinth and it pooped him out in the city.  The Labyrinth does do stupid shit." Invisible Crow
"He's all covered in shit..." Night River Hunter
"You will not believe the things I have seen!" Invisible Crow
"I will probably not go with Labyrinth poop as a narrative voice." GM
"Oh c'mon, we can tell him even the Labyrinth didn't want him." Night River Hunter

We have control over Invisible Crow


The germ warfare hit our GM, so being unable to breath rendered gaming a no go.

Game: Asunder - We are Abyssals.  We are bad people.

Mnemia - GM
GM- Ivisible Crow
Zuko - Apostle of Silent Eternity
Kadon - The Ambassador of On Rushing Shadows
Ioni - Night River Hunter


"You don't have to worry about the opposing force dropping a minor bomb in your volcano and 'whoops, the whole thing is erupting and your shit is blowing up'." Ivisible Crow
"I'd comment on the flawed understanding of geology that informs the statement that you just made but this whole thing is just ridiculous anyway, so..." The Ambassador
"I am well aware of the total lack of science in there, but think about every trope everywhere involving a volcano." Ivisible Crow
"I do not deny." The Ambassador
"that would be another thing, for some reason the laws of science will abandon you and they will get it to erupt." Ivisible Crow.
"Just as easily as you can blow up a volcano with a bomb, you can freeze a volcano with a bomb. So, it all balances out." GM
"My brain hurts.  Can we think of something less absurd and play Exalted instead?" The Ambassador
"The fact that you think Exalted is less absured..." Ivisible Crow
"The irony is not lost on me in this instance, quiet you." The Ambassador

"I have high hopes and small faith." The Ambassador

"What was I giving up for this? Survival?  was that what we came to an agreement on?" Ivisible Crow
"Yes.  All three of you had survival and one of you had to take Sail." The Ambassador.
"Yes.  Because I like sleeping in the dirt... below the dirt." Night River Hunter channeling the creepy
"Because that wasn't creepy at all!" Invisible Crow

"Why you bastard, did you honestly install it under 'downloads?'" Invisible Crow

"... Or the pretty pretty princess as her friends like to call her." GM
"Does she like to pirouette?" Night River Hunter
"I'm sure she appreciates that." The Ambassador
"She does." GM

"It's there to maitain Invisible Crow.  Make sure its fed properly, pissed, etc.  It also has a slave collar, it also has no authority in this situation." GM
...
"Invisible Crow is put under your authority, you may use it as you see fit.  Invisible Crow appears genderless.  You could order it to drop trow to determine its gender since you have a slave collar, but no one appears to have cared." GM
"I can just see Apostle if he has this power in the game, and what he would do" Night River Hunter after being given the control remote for Invisible Crow.
"Oh he will.  Everyone in the party will have access to the slave collar over Invisible Crow." GM

"You're going to have to go pantsless through all of Stygia with a trumpet up your butt." Night River Hunter

"7 Successes!!!" Night River Hunter
"Alright how does this work." GM
"You give it an apple.  then you draw a dickbutt on it." Night River Hunter
"Whaaat???" GM
"I need Night River Hunter translation on that..." Invisible Crow

"Obviously you saw this at the edge, and you got very distracted." Night River Hunter
"Uggggh... What the fuck am I looking at!?" Invisible Crow
"A clown!" GM
"Fucking somebody in a bubble." Night River Hunter
"Was this an unintentional 'you see a clown.'?" Invisbile Crow
"This is Night River Hunter, there is no unintentional." The Ambassador

"Never considered Int Larceny as what you needed to apply Black Face." GM

"I will organize... I'd like 2 hookers for my friend here.  He doesn't like to participate, but he would like to watch and potentially kiss at the end.  However, do you have a backdoor that he could leave by... And slip her a little extra... for the back door." Night River Hunter
"Out of curiosity where is the Greece analog in Creation?" The Ambassador
"The... oh the country!  I was like, why are you bringing up Lube now?" Invisible Crow

"I'm assuming your social negative wouldn't preclude you from going in to a store and buying clothes for me." Invisible Crow
"I don't think so, but I think you'd look great in a pink tutu." Night River Hunter

"I am shocked that you made your character a slave to all of these assholes." GM
"This is called a fun experiment." Invisible Crow
"You're going to show up to this event in a Tutu and a flasher coat, I don't... If this is fun for you, I wonder what sort of fantasy you're living out here." GM
"None.?" Invisible Crow
"He likes not having control over himself." Night River Hunter

"Oh oh, I found something." Night River Hunter
"Oh jesus." Invisible Crow
"I found something" Night River Hunter