Houston, we are now testing how long a 2 liter of soda will hiss....

"Apparently for evil laffy taffy to enter the apartment, a gnome must bring it." Zuko

"Thanks guys, also, Zuko, you're not allowed to negotiated with the incarnate... EVER!" Kadon

"She is one who can find you." GM
"Does she have ribbons on her." Ioni
"Oh hahaha... that would be... awkward." Kadon

The following happened in Text while Kadon and Zuko had a heart to heart about secrets and how they are bad for your health.
"Ioni offers Mnemia popcorn to toss at the pattern spiders." Ioni
"Popcorn is hard to throw effectively." Mnemia
"So it's a challenge." Ioni
"What about something like chicken nuggets." Mnemia
"That would work, do we need to have bbq sauce or would you prefer honey mustard?" Ioni
"Honey mustard will stick better so I'll take that one." Mnemia
"Ok... GM, can Ioni and Mnemia get a barrel of chicken nuggets and a bucket of honey mustard dip?" Ioni
"Who gets pissed first?  The spiders, or Mercury?" Mnemia
"..." GM
"A third option is that a spider eats a nugget, then falls off the loom of fate.... Or swarm the bucket." Mnemia
"The equivalent of it I suppose you could find." GM
"Then they weave into creation a McDonald's on every street corner." Mnemia
"I can just see a pattern spider breaded in chicken nuggets." Ioni
****
"Mnemia, if that happens on every street corner, what would happen if we tossed coffee beans at them?  Would we get an Exalteds Starbucks?" Ioni
"Only if they are chocolate covered.  Normal coffee beans aren't good to eat plain." Mnemia

"Please, please, stop taunting Causality." Kadon

"You know that Essence Bazooka may make a really good sleep aid..." Zuko

"Ring ring ring... incarnaphone!" Zuko

"I have unleashed nothing, this shit has been brewing since before you got here!" GM

"C'mon Kadon... grow some balls." Mnemia

"Oh it's all about Kadon and his precious balls." Zuko
"I'm sorry, what were you talking about?" Kadon

"We need a wind shield so this doesn't happen." Ioni

"He's talking about necrophilia." Kadon

"If that's the case [NPC being goth], can we hold her down and spray copper tone insta-tan in her face?" Ioni
"Can we get her a copy of 50 shades of grey?" Zuko

"Kadon, near as you can tell us, has boating things...." Zuko
"Shush." Kadon

"Can I touch the butt." Ioni seeing a boat.
"What?" GM
"Let's let him tell the 2's before we unleash Ioni on it." Mnemia

"Just saying, the last time we picked up something interesting as a side note, it was a different form of Exaltation." Zuko

"Oh good, gonna hand wave that one away." Mnemia on a botch
"Awww...." GM

"How long?" Zuko
"That's not something you ask another man." Kadon

"Have you tried to tie down giant man to a metal boat?" GM

"Someone choking in the background?" GM
"I have a cat that is trying to pass a hairball here." Mnemia

"So we set up a lazy-susan on the boat, put Kadon on it and spin it around." Zuko
"Guys!!! I'm dizzy..." Kadon

"We pay other people to sail for us." Kadon
"Wait, I get paid???" Mnemia
"With cookies." Ioni
"No no no, we fixed the *glitch*" Kadon

"Nobody do anything stupid.." Zuko
"...shit..." Ioni

"10.  Wait, that is the wrong number of dice.... 30." Kadon

"Even David Bowie thinks his package needs more room to breathe." GM
"Why are you thinking of David Bowies package?" Ioni

"I vote we kill the cock sucker." Zuko
"Kill." Mnemia
"Kill.." Ioni
"That's your guys' solution to everything." GM
"No, sometimes it's punch." Zuko
"Yea, like with Gavin.  He's not been killed, just punched." Ioni

"What I have is a fuck load of Essence.... Essence that will do horrible things to you." Zuko
"I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. But I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughters go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you."  Mnemia
"Apparently Mnemia threatened and very successfully, intimidated a 56k modem." GM

"GM is getting his food on." Zuko
"Yeah, he's eating sushi off a nude model." Ioni


"I have bacon and popcorn, it's a healthy snack." GM

"Does anyone else hear a circus?" Kadon
"I had a cat drop down on my desk, does that count?" Mnemia

"Out of all of us, Scarlet can kill us all because we've been milking her for Booze 'n' all." Mnemia

"When I give characters names, you re-name them like Spider-Btich.. or Batman." GM

"It's the Impostors." Kadon
"Fuckin' A, after this I am going to fuck those impostors so much." Zuko
"But that would be fucking ourselves." Ioni
"Alright then, I am going to punch one of them in the face, like Kadon.... Sorry Kadon, but between you and Ioni, more people may be upset with Ioni being punched." Zuko
"Why not Mnemia?" Ioni
"Oh she would hurt me." Zuko

"What about our incubator?" Zuko

"Upon meeting the spawn but not finding the right spawn..." Mnemia

"It'd be funny if these impostors are really your kids." Ioni
"Sorry Ryan, I'm going to have to punch your kids." Zuko

"I asked you what your opinions on beating your children..." Zuko
"Third column, right next to Gavin and Autocthon." Mnemia

"If you got a problem, yo we'll solve it.. Checkout your face while our Dawn Caste destroys it!" Zuko.