Bring on the Fap Calendar!

It's been a while!  Happy holidays, and lets bring in the new year with more games!

"For GM"  Mnemia links.
"So, you're giving GM his anime porn collection he should watch?"  Ioni
"I suspect he's already fapped to them all."  Mnemia
"Most likely." Ioni
"It's mildly disturbing, you guys debating what I might be fapping to... something wrong about that.  Also, not seen any of those, so your thoughts are wrong."  GM
"We obviously need to pool resources and give you an anime librarian fapping calendar."  Ioni

"YAY FOR BEING HOME WHERE A MOTHERFUCKING CHIHUAHUA ISN'T FUCKING MY PILLOWS TO CLAIM THEM!... can we nuke all chihuahuas in the world?  It would make my life easier."  Ioni
"You are not an animal person are you." Mnemia
"I love corgis, cats, border collies  Pyrenees  etc... I just hate most dogs that can be used for footballs... I'm also allergic to them, so today is the first day I can breathe without feeling an on-coming cold."  Ioni
"Sorry.  For whatever reason I thought it was GM complaining about small animals.  Which might be even worse."  Mnemia

"Is there a Hallmark card for, 'Sorry, thought you were GM.'?"  Mnemia

"For the record, most friends would at the most look for single friends to hook them up with, or at the least try to discourage porn.  It says something about you guys pooling together to give out 'fap material.'"  GM

"The Koala was a complete terror.  Basically was going through drug withdrawl from not having eucalyptus, which is apparently a lot like fuckin' crack for them, and was just a holy terror."  Kadon
"So it was a Koala raping a cat..." Ioni
"Amongst its numerous crimes it literally raped this gentleman's cat to death."  Kadon
"What the fuck are you people talking about?!" GM
"Koalas in withdrawl." Kadon
"I found this facebook site of 'the guy above was raped by a koala' post... but that's not it.  I want to link to this dammit!"  Ioni

"Koala Chlamydia.  One direction boy band member fear infection."  Ioni
"What the shit?" Kadon
"I type in Koala raping a cat to death and on the second page I come up with Koala Chlamydia: One direction boy band members fear infection." Ioni

"So, apparently if a koala urinates on you it puts you at risk of Chlamydia." Ioni
"Oh it wasn't bad enough to link it, you had to read it too?" Mnemia

"Also, for the record, if you are making a calendar.  No on the koala raping a cat." GM
"Make a calendar?" Ioni
"Okay, he's down with the fapable librarians calendar.  He just doesn't want any Koala's on it." Kadon
"Topic of discussion 2 seconds before the damn koala!" GM
"What if the Koala was grabbing a boob?  Kinda squeezing with its claws?"  Ioni
"No" GM
"What's wrong with that, GM.  Also, there's a lot of effort going into making a calendar so why would you object?" Ioni
"Yeah, what would you possible object to that for?"  Mnemia

"I'm just going to confirm here, you said rooming, right?" Kadon
"I said rooming.  What did you think I said?" Ioni
"I heard a different vowel." Kadon
"Ruuming?"  Ioni
"Ramming." Mnemia
"Oh, okay, thank you." Ioni
"I actually heard an 'i' but, y'know, whatever." Kadon
"Well if he wants to rim her, he wants to rim her."  Ioni
"I do not..!" GM

"I would much rather have the fap calendar." GM

"I heard a lot about it, and then every time I go and look at what it's about, I turn right around and stop giving a shit.  And then a couple of weeks later, someone says this was awesome, and I forget why I walked away from it, so I look at the premise again and read the premise and turn right around and stop giving a shit again.  So.." Mnemia on choosing anime.

"And they will constantly drag you through crap that you aren't prepared for." GM
"Like the freaky little children." Ioni
"No comment your honor." GM
"Goddammit GM, exactly what the hell do you think little 6 year olds do in their free time?  They play with fuckin' dolls they don't go in the mother fucking underworld." Ioni
"Yeah, well this is exalted, this is okay." GM
"Doesn't matter!"  Ioni
"On the one hand... hehehe... On the other hand, I have to side with GM, this is Exalted."  Kadon

"Given the amount of shit the circle has given him (Gavin), he intends to stay far far away when they (Mnemia's kids) come of age and be there a while."  GM
"That just proves he has an intelligence higher than one." Mnemia
"Alternately it proves he is interested in them.  Which is kinda gross at this age."  Kadon
"How... No!  Doesn't matter.  If he is in the vicinity, he is going to get nuked by a fly-by drone without a chance to say 'no, I was at the coffee shop all day.  I have not idea!'"  GM
"Note to self, invent virginity guarding drones." Kadon
"Good call." Ioni
"Unfortunately, when exposed to Ioni, they just explode." Kadon
"Shutup!" Ioni
"The mental images of that... I cannot un-see."  GM
"It's okay, you're just jealous of my pelvic thrust." Ioni
"That needs to go on the boards.  The pelvic thrust.  That is a bold statement."  GM

"You do all that work and you take it out to dinner and all you get is an ally.  Not a sex bunny, an ally."  Ioni
"If you want to sleep with your weapon spirit, that gives me bizarre character concept ideas but I could see it working."  Kadon
"All of a sudden I see form Dusk Til Dawn the one dude with the crotch gun."  GM
"Don't underestimate the crotch gun."  Ioni
"Allow me to just say I call her Vera!" Kadon

"Don't you dare hurt my dapper weasel!" Ioni

"What's wrong with Zombies?" GM
"Zombies are the laziest form of creature... in... media.." Mnemia
"You dislike they are over used?" GM
"They are lazy.  They are sloppy.  They are not interesting!  They are not creative.  They are just trite crap!" Mnemia

"I haven't played Paranoia in 15 years and I'm still burnt out."  Kadon
"What?!"  Ioni
"Wow, that's a statement."  GM

"I may be put on training detail." Ioni
"Here's some of the worst things on the internet."  GM

"Oh yeah!  We found some anorexia adult content too!" Ioni
"Oh jesus." Kadon
"It was messed up." Ioni
"Fuck this, I'm out!" Kadon